Farah. Full-time Student. Malaysian.

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Hey peeps ! How are you? Tonight i supposed to pull all nighter to finish up my reports. Still got another 41 credit hours to go. But i miss my baby so much so i had to put some ink here. lol 

Today i just finished up my first paper for the last sem in UUM, dont ask me coz i dont have any feels bout it; been worried too much that nowadays i barely have feeling at all. Honestly this sem got me real bad. I never got this bad for 3 years i've been here. A lot of lessons that i learnt from this semester. Im promise im gonna make a special post bout it later; maybe after i've finish all my tasks here. 

I dont even know what to write but what i know is i had to write something here. haha. Tbh, i miss my old me a bit. Bein alone, sitting on my bed finishing my novels collection and playing games. Without me trying hard to socialize with people. Sometimes it was fun, sometimes it make me exhausted so much that i want to cry and just weeping alone on my bed all day long. But hey- i dont even have enough time to sleep. I've become an caffeine addicted and i ate a lot on this semester. Stress make me do so- stress make me eat ramen so much that i cant even believe i was such a health freak back time before. 

The temptation to go back to my own self is really hard enough to fight over it. I tried and even now trying. But sometimes i lost to it; so i will quickly write it off. Im afraid i'll drown once again. No one ever know the rage that brewing inside my heart. That always clawing way out. Im afraid of my little own beast. I try to put a happy face. For everyone's sake. For myself too. I try to overcome the overthinking. But sometimes i lost and that what scares me the most. 

Im still human. Even me needs some help. 

xoxo; 

Farah L.

Hey peeps ! How are you? Tonight i supposed to pull all nighter to finish up my reports. Still got another 41 credit hours to go. But i miss my baby so much so i had to put some ink here. lol 

Today i just finished up my first paper for the last sem in UUM, dont ask me coz i dont have any feels bout it; been worried too much that nowadays i barely have feeling at all. Honestly this sem got me real bad. I never got this bad for 3 years i've been here. A lot of lessons that i learnt from this semester. Im promise im gonna make a special post bout it later; maybe after i've finish all my tasks here. 

I dont even know what to write but what i know is i had to write something here. haha. Tbh, i miss my old me a bit. Bein alone, sitting on my bed finishing my novels collection and playing games. Without me trying hard to socialize with people. Sometimes it was fun, sometimes it make me exhausted so much that i want to cry and just weeping alone on my bed all day long. But hey- i dont even have enough time to sleep. I've become an caffeine addicted and i ate a lot on this semester. Stress make me do so- stress make me eat ramen so much that i cant even believe i was such a health freak back time before. 

The temptation to go back to my own self is really hard enough to fight over it. I tried and even now trying. But sometimes i lost to it; so i will quickly write it off. Im afraid i'll drown once again. No one ever know the rage that brewing inside my heart. That always clawing way out. Im afraid of my little own beast. I try to put a happy face. For everyone's sake. For myself too. I try to overcome the overthinking. But sometimes i lost and that what scares me the most. 

Im still human. Even me needs some help. 

xoxo; 

Farah L.